It’s that time of year again: time to rank the things we love and pass judgement on our entertainment in authoritative tones!
Lists, am I right?
- Favorite Baby Face: Christine Booth, Bones
- Favorite New Face: Colin O’Donoghue, Once Upon a Time
- Favorite Reality TV Face: Eliana Girard, SYTYCD
- Trashiest Show I Watched More Than Once: Dance Moms
- Best Way to End a Season: “DAMMIT JERRY!”
- New Jack Bristow: Jack Hodgins, Bones
- Happiest Proposal: Ben and Leslie, Parks and Recreation
- Weepiest Proposal: Barney and Robin, HIMYM
- Favorite Accent: Jonny Lee Miller, Elementary
- Favorite Imaginary Business: “Ringling Brothers for Brothers,” Happy Endings
- Favorite Public Service Announcement: Ron Swanson on the bacon shortage, Parks and Recreation
- Favorite Zen Moment: Nick Miller in the pool, New Girl
- Favorite “Oh SNAP” Moment: Arastoo explains the relationship between 9/11 and his Muslim faith–and gives Finn a total verbal smackdown in the process, Bones.
Arastoo: Why would it be more difficult for me than anyone else?
Finn: Because of–because you share the same religion as those men.
Arastoo: You share the same religion with men who cherry-picked the Bible to justify slavery…Those assumptions you made. Those quick generalizations. What about the vengeance and the bloodshed in the Old Testament?…The Crusades, the Inquisition—are these events guided by a religion of peace? No, they were guided by self-important men who think they know more than the God they claim to worship. This was not the work of religion. It was arrogance. It was hypocrisy. It was hate. Those horrible men who hijacked those planes hijacked my religion that day, too. They insulted my God. So no, this isn’t too difficult. It’s a privilege to be able to serve this victim, to show him the care and love that was so absent that day.
- Favorite Musical Moment: The Lumineers’ “Ho Hey,” Bones. I belong with you, you belong with me.
- Favorite Spoof: Community‘s Law and Order episode, “Basic Lupine Urology”
- Cleverest Title: “Basic Lupine Urology.” Think about it.
- Favorite Speech: Leslie Knope in “The Debate,” Parks and Recreation
“I’m very angry. I’m angry that Bobby Newport would hold this town hostage and threaten to leave if you don’t give him what he wants. It’s despicable. Corporations are not allowed to dictate what a city needs. That power belongs to the people. Bobby Newport and his daddy would like you to think it belongs to them. I love this town. And when you love something, you don’t threaten it, you don’t punish it. You fight for it. You take care of it. You put it first. As your City Councilor, I will make sure that no one takes advantage of Pawnee. If I seem too passionate, it’s because I care. And if I come on too strong, it’s because I feel strongly. And if I push too hard, it’s because things aren’t moving fast enough. This is my home, you are my family, and I promise you, I’m not going anywhere.”
- Favorite Place Anyone Could Be During That Speech: Hanging with some nuns. Dammit, Jerry.
- Favorite SNL Line: “If you went to the lowest circle of hell, you’d still be 45 minutes outside of Scranton.” (I have family in Scranton. They will be hearing this.)
- Best Way to Resolve a Disagreement: Jeff’s magic friendship hats, Community
- Most Inspirational Moment: Leslie votes for herself, Parks and Recreation
- Canceled Show I’ll Miss Most: Awake
- Canceled Show I Probably Could’ve Become the Most Obsessed With: The Finder. I didn’t love it, but I think I could have. R.I.P Michael Clarke Duncan.
- Loudest “OMG WHAT” Reaction: Ron shows Diane his jazzy side, Parks and Recreation
- Favorite Precursor to Sexytimes: Booth takes his ice cream upstairs, Bones
- Favorite Interrupted Sexytimes: B&B on the washing machine, Bones
WHY ARE YOU ANSWERING THE PHONE?!
- Favorite Office Supply Sexytimes: Liz and Criss, 30 Rock
- Favorite Cameo: JOE BIDEN on Parks and Recreation
- Favorite Face:
So what are your 2012 favorites? And HAPPY NEW YEAR, everyone! Here’s hoping 2013 brings laughter, happy tears, fall-off-the-couch moments, and an endless supply of Victor Garber.