Back in the states, Tommy’s got some stiff business competition in the form of a total shot-for-shot recreation of his business. Seems fair. His mysterious adversary could be Jason Statham, but he’s actually Dr. Saperstein, who is not nearly as cool of an adversary. Mona Lisa and Jean-Ralphio have their father convinced that Tom is ruining their lives, but they’re pretty much doing that to themselves by wearing five layers of denim at once.
This outfit, on the other hand, can get it.
Tom stages a meeting to make the siblings come clean, but the Sapersteins learn nothing from this experience and make absolutely no adjustments to their lifestyle. Also, Dr. Saperstein is Ann and Chris’s doctor because Ann is pregnant! She and Chris are going to be parents! Little Chickpea is going to have play dates with baby Flannel!
I’m still confused by how quickly Ann jumped from “I’m weird with kids” to “I want a baby,” but let’s go with it. Our cunning, pliable, chestnut-haired sunfish is going to be a great mom. A new and better human race begins with this kid! Thank goodness Leslie’s there to celebrate the occasion, because Jerry is never allowed to hear any good news ever again. This is what Leslie does. She celebrates her friends, and she’ll do it whether she’s in office or traveling the world. Anything can happen.
“WHY IS THERE NO RICE IN THIS MUNICIPAL GOVERNMENT BUILDING”
CHRIS: “I just assumed you were lying.”
APRIL: “Thank you.”
“Hogwarts is fictional. Do you know that? It’s important to me that you know that.” He doesn’t mean it, Andy. He’s just mad he never got a letter.
Also, all I really wanted out of this episode was a two-second staredown between Ben Wyatt and a dalek. Sigh.
“History began on July 4th, 1776. Everything before that was a mistake.”
“British people love me. There was this British kid in my high school who always called me Big Ben and would punch me really hard on the arm and go ‘bong, bong, bong’–oh, he might’ve hated me.”
“Fine. Enjoy the fact that your royal overlords are a frail old woman and a tiny baby.”
“Andy, we are guests of Lord Covington, you should let him…play with the blue helicopter.”
“Well, um, have you heard of Scotland?”
“There was a statue of a lion inside, and I found a yoyo.”
“When’d you make the switch to boxer briefs?”
“We’ll be stopping in those two butcher shops first.”
JERRY: “You know actually, before my kids, I looked a lot like you Chris.”
CHRIS: “I am very sad. Please stop talking.”
“Let me just say how truly, deeply trill it is to be standing in this dope-ass conference room addressing a bunch of people in a business meeting. It’s really a dream come true.”
“I don’t even know what a math camp is.”
Andy Dwyer knows pretty much everything about Stonehenge.
I need Ben Wyatt in a powdered wig to say “what’s up” to me every morning.